> >>>Windows XP jamaican style
> >>>Dear Constumas:
> >>>
> >>>It look lik dem mek mistake an ship out couple a
> >>>copies of WINDOWS XP YAADIE VERSION somwhere ina
> >>>Idaho. If you good ole counry folks in Idaho need a
> >>>translatian fi di comman dem here dem is:
> >>>
> >>>When yuh open di Yaadie edition yuh wi si di opening
> >>>screen. Itreads: "WINDAS XP," wit a background
> >>>picture
> >>>of Halfway tree Square.
> >>>
> >>>When yuh start di program yuh wi hear di Bad bwoy
> >>>antem: Murdara Blood deh pan yuh shoulda By Buju
> >>>Banton
> >>>Please also note:
> >>>Recycle Bin is labeled "General penitentiary."
> >>>My Computer is called "A Fimi Own."
> >>>The Inbox is referred to as "Barrel come."
> >>>Deleted Items are referred to as "Gaan, Rub out, Yuh
> >>>Salt."
> >>>Dial up Networking is called "Ring mi Cellie."
> >>>Control Panel is known as the "Babylon."
> >>>Performin' an "illegal operation" is known as
> >>>"Smuggling not allowed unless part of the Govament
> >>>Hard Drive is referred to as "Stiff Ood."
> >>>Instead of an error message, a "Ediat! Yuh know weh
> >>>yuh a do? pops up.
> >>>
> >>> CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN DA YAADIEEDITION:
> >>> OK................Cool Noh
> >>> Cancel...........No badda yah man
> >>> Reset.............Rewine
> >>> Yes...............Irie
> >>> No................No sah
> >>> Find.............. Look fi it
> >>> Browse............Faas
> >>> Back..............Tun roun
> >>> Help.............. (this is not a
> >>>
> >>> feature ..Jamaicans know it all an doan
> >>> need noh help)
> >>> Stop..............Dun now
> >>> Start.............Gwan troo
> >>> Settings..........Di set up
> >>>
> >>>Also note dat keyboard noh of di YAADIE EDITION no
> >>>have di letter "H." Wi doan use dat in wi vocabulary
> >>>..So dis is how yuh mus type certain H words :
> >>>
> >>> Help.. elp
> >>> Horrible..Arrible
> >>> Heart Art
> >>> Heavy .. Eby
> >>> Honda.. Unda
> >>> Handkerchif .. Kerchief
> >>> Holiday Alliday
> >>>
> >>>Please feel free to return any found YAADIE EDITION
> >>>to
> >>>the INS for instant deportation back to JA.
> >>

Who wants to be a millionaire

After watching the hit show "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" a man reaches to his wife, in bed for a intimate moment.
"Not tonight, I have a headache", she said He responds "are you sure?" "yes !" she replies
He asks "Is that your final answer?"
"Yes ! Yes ! Yes!" she says " that is my final answer ! "
After that , he clamly says " Ok, then I'd like to phone a friend

Subject: Things You Will Never Hear A Jamaican Man Say

1. "No, wifey, tek my cyar instead."
2. "Waiter, this steak is overcooked."
3. "She 'ave a nice body ... but 'ar batty too big."
4. "Whaapen Mr. Deejay, yuh cyaah play some more calypso?"
5. "De pill doan gree wid me wife, so ah gweh get a vasectomy."
6. "No, Chooksie, ah cyaah tek anodda whites(rum), mi haffe drive all de way to Kingston, an' it wet and dark outside."
7. "Some ah mi closest bredren-dem gay, yu no se'et."
8. "Size doan matter."
9. "Yeah man, me nyam unda two foot table.
10. "Nuff respect to Brian Lara."